Blog Posts

Perfectionism: The Enemy of Success

Perfectionism: The Enemy of Success

Cut and Paste, I am not sure what that means to you but when I started my career, cut and paste meant cut with scissors and paste with glue. That is how we made the Program Flyer at the Recreation Department. So now, I am learning that in order for my messages to...

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The Real Self Care

The Real Self Care

  I did not get the memo about self-care growing up, especially during young adulthood, and motherhood. I did get the memo about self-care when I entered the world of life coaching. At first, I thought it sounded kind of icky and uncomfortable. Maybe like you, I...

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We Teach People How to Treat Us

We Teach People How to Treat Us

I am just gonna say it, Ruffus and I did not do so great at Doggie School. Phew, I said it. Another thing, it was on me, NOT Ruffus. The very nice, kind, and world-renowned dog trainer said it was on me. I would call Ruffus 5 times before he came. It went like this...

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None of our Business what Others Think

None of our Business what Others Think

"I didn't tell you this yesterday 'cause I was so upset," said my husband Martin as he sat down on the edge of our bed. Panic started to rise up in me as I waited for him to tell me what was on his mind. Here we go. Martin and Ruffus were walking down our street, a...

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Gossip and Boundaries

Gossip and Boundaries

    One of my favorite people in the whole wide world is my coach Susan Hyatt. A few months ago she told me that she was approached in the gym, by a woman who wanted to gossip about another woman. Her response was " I don't talk about people behind their...

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The Pushback Continued

The Pushback Continued

In any relationship whether with ourselves or others, we get used to doing things or being a certain way. When we decide to set a boundary it is because we want to make a change. I did that when I stopped drinking wine, my clients do it all the time. We, humans, have...

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The Pushback

The Pushback

    I am pretty sure that when people are afraid, hesitant, and nervous to Set Boundaries, it is because of The Pushback. Pushback is when the boundary we have set is not honored, it comes in various forms. Some of the common ones are ignoring the boundary,...

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Chuck It

Chuck It

My week started with a broken washer, a broken furnace (had to get a new furnace), Mother troubles, oh and a trip to the vet. I did everything possible to both solve the problems, manage my frustration, and remain civil. As I was journaling the solution came to me for...

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Set Boundaries

Set Boundaries

My dog Ruffus continues to teach me every day. Last evening we heard a short, clear "ruff' out of him. Ruffus doesn't bark, I mean to say he barks about once a month. So when we heard a "ruff" from the kitchen we knew it meant something. Someone he didn't know very...

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Whack Upside of The Head

Whack Upside of The Head

Grief comes along out of the place it lives inside us and whacks you upside the head, at least it does for me. On this day 51 years ago, my baby brother died, he was 14. He died from autoerotic asphyxiation. It was a tragedy that changed me and my life and the lives...

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Boundaries

Boundaries

I learn a lot about a lot of things in life from my dog. his name is Ruffus and we rescued each other. he was abandoned on the beach in the Dominican Republic and needed a family and a home and well I didn't know it but I needed a dog. At this time of year, lots of...

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We don’t do that anymore.

We don’t do that anymore.

Up until a couple of years ago, I was very attached to my habit of nightly glasses of wine with my husband. It dawned on me one day that I was asking those glasses of wine to do a lot for me. To entertain, to relax, to unwind to help manage uncomfortable feelings like...

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