Perfectionism: The Enemy of Success
Cut and Paste, I am not sure what that means to you but when I started my career, cut and paste meant cut with scissors and paste with glue. That is how we made the Program Flyer at the Recreation Department. So now, I am learning that in order for my messages to...
The Real Self Care
I did not get the memo about self-care growing up, especially during young adulthood, and motherhood. I did get the memo about self-care when I entered the world of life coaching. At first, I thought it sounded kind of icky and uncomfortable. Maybe like you, I thought...
We Teach People How to Treat Us
I am just gonna say it, Ruffus and I did not do so great at Doggie School. Phew, I said it. Another thing, it was on me, NOT Ruffus. The very nice, kind, and world-renowned dog trainer said it was on me. I would call Ruffus 5 times before he came. It went like this...
None of our Business what Others Think
"I didn't tell you this yesterday 'cause I was so upset," said my husband Martin as he sat down on the edge of our bed. Panic started to rise up in me as I waited for him to tell me what was on his mind. Here we go. Martin and Ruffus were walking down our street, a...
Gossip and Boundaries
One of my favorite people in the whole wide world is my coach Susan Hyatt. A few months ago she told me that she was approached in the gym, by a woman who wanted to gossip about another woman. Her response was " I don't talk about people behind their backs unless it...
The Pushback Continued
In any relationship whether with ourselves or others, we get used to doing things or being a certain way. When we decide to set a boundary it is because we want to make a change. I did that when I stopped drinking wine, my clients do it all the time. We, humans, have...
The Pushback
I am pretty sure that when people are afraid, hesitant, and nervous to Set Boundaries, it is because of The Pushback. Pushback is when the boundary we have set is not honored, it comes in various forms. Some of the common ones are ignoring the boundary, testing the...
Chuck It
My week started with a broken washer, a broken furnace (had to get a new furnace), Mother troubles, oh and a trip to the vet. I did everything possible to both solve the problems, manage my frustration, and remain civil. As I was journaling the solution came to me for...
Set Boundaries
My dog Ruffus continues to teach me every day. Last evening we heard a short, clear "ruff' out of him. Ruffus doesn't bark, I mean to say he barks about once a month. So when we heard a "ruff" from the kitchen we knew it meant something. Someone he didn't know very...
Whack Upside of The Head
Grief comes along out of the place it lives inside us and whacks you upside the head, at least it does for me. On this day 51 years ago, my baby brother died, he was 14. He died from autoerotic asphyxiation. It was a tragedy that changed me and my life and the lives...
Boundaries
I learn a lot about a lot of things in life from my dog. his name is Ruffus and we rescued each other. he was abandoned on the beach in the Dominican Republic and needed a family and a home and well I didn't know it but I needed a dog. At this time of year, lots of...
We don’t do that anymore.
Up until a couple of years ago, I was very attached to my habit of nightly glasses of wine with my husband. It dawned on me one day that I was asking those glasses of wine to do a lot for me. To entertain, to relax, to unwind to help manage uncomfortable feelings like...
The Next Step
Imagine standing at the start of a Marathon race. It means you are about to take 63,000 steps in order to cover the 26 miles 385 yards over the course of several hours. It is a crazy feeling, let me tell you. Each time I have done it I think to myself, " What was I...
Holiday Madness to Holiday Magic
Create the Holiday Season of your Dreams. I mean Tis the Season to be Jolly and Hohohos. Yet..... If that is true then why do so many of us find the season to be stressful, some of us dare to say "we hate" the holiday season, while others grin and bear it. I mean it...
You Were Born For Greatness
You were born for greatness and you know what greatness is, it is inside of you. My teacher Blair Abbass said these words in the Mindfulness course I am taking. I don't know if I have ever heard words that ring more true to me. We were born for greatness, we have...
It’s a Beautiful Life
When I was in the 12th grade, I returned home one Saturday morning in January to find out that my little brother, a pesky 14-year-old had died. He died of autoerotic asphixiation. I know, what is that? It means he hung himself while self-pleasuring, it was supposed to...
Money Stories
I am a Life Coach, I help people get their best lives. Whatever that is for them. Coaching gets results quickly. I am often asked to give examples of how coaching helps people and the answer is Life Coaching helps any and all parts of life. One way that coaching helps...
Fine Hair, Eagles, and Stories
" Madam, you have such lovely, beautiful fine hair," said the massage therapist, a lady from Germany who speaks like a fraulein. I mean I honestly thought she was talking about someone else, except well I was the only one on the massage table and in the room for that...
The Two White Heads: A Love Story
I have the very good fortune to look out my window, into the backyard of my neighbors, and witness a love story, it warms my heart. I just want to be clear that I am not stalking my neighbors it is the way the yards are set up, my backyard leads to their backyard, in...
Mindfulness and Time
As I write this I am preparing to make a farewell journey. Next week I will travel to my childhood home to say, most likely farewell to my Mother. At nearly 90 years old my Mother has lived a full life, one filled with children and passion and interests and it seems...