I am a bit, I am sorry to say Pandemic Weary. It is hard for me to say this, because at the same time, I am so grateful! I am grateful for being healthy, I am grateful for my husband being healthy and all my family being healthy. I am grateful that none of us have suffered from Covid 19 and I am grateful for where I live, and being safe and my dog Ruffus and my kitten Corey. So, I feel bad feeling weary.
The truth is well, I am grateful AND I feel weary, of the uncertainty, the restrictions, the sameness, it is in fact a heavy load that we are all carrying, it makes us weary…..
In this state of weariness I was struck at the sight of our new kitten Corey, she had escaped from the deck to the garden ( that is itself another story) she was perfectly still and quiet ( also another story) dumbstruck as I was by my quiet, still kitten, my gaze traveled upwards to where her gaze was transfixed. There my gray and white, long haired, eleven week old tabby kitten was seeing for the first time in her young life, BIRDS. It was a truly wondrous sight to behold. About six little yellow and gray birds were chirping above her head, it sounded like they were saying ” Kitten alert, kitten alert”! Corey just watched in awe, in wonder. I watched Corey in awe and wonder. I watched as this little kitten watched the birds, as cats have done forever, but for her, it was the first time, it is hard to describe how her wonder at the birds was contagious. I was in wonder watching her watch the birds, and my husband was in wonder watching me watch her watch the birds and Ruffus, well he just wonders why we had to go and get a kitten at all, but that is a different kind of wonder and a different story.
So, I got to wondering, is the antidote to weary, wonder? Is it to look around us, for that spectacular way of seeing the world through new eyes? Is it understanding that we truly live in a world of wonder? Maybe we just have to open our eyes? I don’t know for sure, but one thing I do know for sure is that many of us are Pandemic Weary. We have grown weary of focussing on Covid 19 and social distancing and masks and uncertainty and spending so much time at home and watching Covid numbers. My sense is that if we redirect our focus to wonder we will in fact feel less weary. Maybe if we focus on wonders we will feel better. If focussing on hard stuff makes us weary, it seems like a safe bet, that by focussing on the wondrous stuff we will feel well maybe wonderful? To me, it seems well worth a try.